In 2005 I conceived my first child, two months later I needed no pregnancy test to tell me I was with child: I can remember opening the curtains one morning, standing still and once again clocking this deep vibration, a fluttering pulse within my body that was strangely unfamiliar yet at the same quite natural, I knew. Turning to my partner, I told him we were having a baby.
I felt amazed and blessed by the power of this bodily communication I was offered by my unborn child – an inner hum that emanated through my every cell, I felt deeply humbled and radiant.
I adored my pregnancy, caring for and appreciating this magical connection and contentedness within my body.
Being my first baby, I was offered much advice by doctors, midwives, family and friends. My sister at the time was training to be a Doula (birth companion and post-birth supporter) and my sister-in-law was a midwife – so I had plentiful support.
However, on reflection I see how I allowed myself to get caught up in the multitude of advice and images.
I felt the expectations and pressures there are for pregnant women to know exactly how to care for their child: the image that I should be the one in charge, the primary carer. These complications and expectations left a tension in my body that interfered with the natural bond I had with my baby and made it harder for me to feel the soundness and simplicity offered by our unified pulse, a constant confirmation that there was nothing I needed to be or do other than connect and walk this journey together.
My son was born in the early hours of the morning. There are no words that can do justice to the love and wonderment of meeting him. The ancient wisdom and still presence this tiny being brought through was extraordinarily powerful. My husband and I were in awe: this was no vulnerable fleshy baby. He was magnificent.
Still attached by the umbilical cord, I lay down and the midwife placed my son on my chest – a moment of joyous repose for us both after hours of surrendering to the movements that would bring him out into the world.
With the advice of the midwife I placed him near my breast so he could latch on. In this moment I felt unsure and began searching for a picture, an image of what this could be. In this I opened the door to an influx of advice and information I had previously read and heard about breast-feeding. I had allowed the expectations to creep in, and I felt my body tense up with this feeling that I SHOULD know what to do.
However what then unfolded is the miraculous part that no one tells you … My son showed me exactly what to do. In a few small movements he snuffled onto my breast, opened his mouth and began to suck, triggering my body to release the colostrum milk he knew he was to find.
How did he know how to do this?
My expectations led me to believe that it was all my job, that I needed to be in control: nobody told me he would be my teacher, that this ancient all-knowing being would show me the way. That it was he who would give me permission to let go and feel the simple power of our connection, to draw from the interactivity that we had been living together for the past nine months. The same unified pulse in utero that would bring all the innate wisdom that was required, my baby showed me that I need not look outside for the answers but know that they are already within.
Thank you to my son, Serge Benhayon and Universal Medicine for confirming that we are all born teachers, and for showing me that I am everything already.
By Anonymous
For more Inspiration …
What is true education? The role of connecting and expressing in education and teaching.
Learning from each other: Rosie’s experience of parenting as a two-way experience and reflection.
Women in Livingness Blog 
I can entirely relate from the birth of my first son also – pure divinity and magnificence. This is a very beautiful sharing that supports us all to settle into and be guided by our inner knowing and not led or squashed by pictures or expectations.
We can receive all the advice and information in the world but if anything it makes matters worse because then we don’t know which advice to follow! However within us is already a knowing that doesn’t quiver or doubt, it just knows.
As a mother who has prided herself and identified very strongly with being a liberal laid back kind of a mother I can honestly say that it’s a kind of parenting that’s way more controlling then it believes itself to be but it buys into the notion that because it sees itself as free and easy that it’s non imposing but in actual fact it’s very imposing but just in a more subversive way than blatantly imposing parenting styles.
I love this blog, it is very touching to read through these words of honesty and humbleness.
It is so easy to get lost in pictures of mothering, when I look around I see most mothers have indeed swallowed and living this imposition. Super amazing and inspiring to read and see a lady free of the poisonous ideals we can hold.
When we are mothering in truth then we are mothering with the support of the Universe because the little Mini Me Mother is happy to stand to the side and let the Universe step in.
So very beautifully said Alexis.
Expectations do mess us around. A lot. When we surrender and allow what is there inside of us to be shared/felt/experienced, there is less mess…
The moment we start to look outside ourselves for answers we have lost the connection to self and we are at the mercy of the outside world. We feel the tension in our body because we give ourselves away when we know what is true. There is nothing to do and no pressure to be placed on ourselves; connection to our essence is all that is needed and from this connection we are impulsed to respond to what is next.
Children are Magnificent Teachers, I love the reflections that children bring. Being open as a parent to the wisdom they bring means our lives are much more fuller.
Our bodies have this innate intelligence that knows how to deal with these situations, current society gets very much in the way of this by all the advise, rules almost, that it says we need. So we think it comes from knowledge outside of us instead from within and of course our child too.
Love how children learn from life as it unfolds. All is a playful learning where there is no right or wrong, just joy, harmony, a trustful openess to themselves and others. How amazing would be bringing this in to the ‘adult life’, this world would be a completely different place to live in.
There are no pictures or words that can describe the moments of tenderness within us. Being able to share with the people around us from this quality is very natural for us. More than we think.
The greater the responsibility we say yes to the more we can see the consistency of Love we need to live. It can be confronting to face but isn’t it what we are here for?
“my baby showed me that I need not look outside for the answers but know that they are already within.” New born babies come with so much wisdom that is there for us to share if we are open to it.
This is so gorgeous; ‘nobody told me he would be my teacher, that this ancient all-knowing being would show me the way.’ I have found with my son that he is so wise and so supportive in his simplicity, it often makes me realise that I have made things complicated and have over thought things when I speak to him.
Surrendering to our inner knowing is one of the gifts offered by pregnancy and motherhood.
One of the most inundated areas of life that receives unsolicited advice is pregnancy and motherhood. If a woman knows she is pregnant without a test, if she spends 9 months feeling and getting to know the baby, why do we doubt (and instil doubt in her) the natural knowing of how to nurture the child?
Beautiful to read of this letting go and allowing others to show us the way. We are absolutely meant to learn our way through life with and through the reflections we offer each other, whatever our ages and relationships with each other.
Gorgeous teaching, our children are so wise, ‘my baby showed me that I need not look outside for the answers but know that they are already within.’
hear hear completely agree Leonne.
Yes when you truly connect to reincarnation and experience how we live one life over and over and over again we are all students and teachers forever learning and returning. At some point you will be the baby again and your son will be an older man. As we go round and round, age takes on a totally different meaning and understanding.
I love what you describe about your pregnancy ‘feel the soundness and simplicity offered by our unified pulse, a constant confirmation that there was nothing I needed to be or do other than connect and walk this journey together.’ This reminded me that this is actually always the case: there is nothing for us to be or do, just connect to God and walk the journey together.
This brings a tear to my eye that ‘are all born teachers’ as it exposes so much of the societal lies we have been fed and swallowed up. It connected to me the fact that we can all learn so much from each other at absolutely any age – even a few hours old. Thank you.
Yes and even in the womb and before!
When we honour the connection anything is possible and age no longer has a barrier to what we can reflect to another.
So beautiful to read this again today and be reminded that we do not have to see life as a struggle and get anxious about the fact that we have not prepared for the event that is about to happen. What if our living way, every day, is our preparation. Being ourselves and bringing all that we are and surrendering to the moment, what if that is what prepares us, connecting to our inner heart, our inner knowing and ” caring for and appreciating this magical connection and contentedness within my body.” And allowing our absolute equality with another being. How awesome that we are all teachers for one another.
Wow – imagine if the whole world approached parenting from this way – we would grow up much more stable, loving and embracing of everything that life has to offer.
Life is beautifully simple and inspiring when we let go of our pictures. Children, with less pictures accumulated in their filing cabinets, are indeed great teachers.
So often we are sold that a new born is here to learn and the parents, family and elders are the only teachers. This blog shows that the true teachers are those that are willing to learn from one another no matter their age.
Small children are the most amazing teachers if we are humble enough to heed their wisdom and I love that they present us with such simple questions that allow us to go deeper with our own inner knowing and expression.
I love that we have this body that communicates way beyond our intellect and I hate that we are not encourage to surrender to that above ALL else we are taught through our antenatal classes.
Choosing to trust our bodies allows us to step outside the expected boundaries of who knows what and how they impart it.
Thank you so much for reminding me of the magic of surrender. Our body knows exactly what to do and how to be when we surrender to giving birth. It even let’s us know if something is amiss and we need support. I love that this little blessing that arrives surrenders to their body and knows innately how to breast feed.
So utterly and completely amazing to appreciate the ancient wisdom that is present in a new born child. It is awe inspiring – no doubt about it – to hold such grandness of love and beauty in your arms. And what’s more is how you had equal wisdom and love to know that here was your teacher, your guide, and you humbly followed in his lead, making you a natural mother.
“I had allowed the expectations to creep in, and I felt my body tense up with this feeling that I SHOULD know what to do.” So many of us have this until we surrender to our deeper knowing and trust what we feel. In my work I support parents on a maternity ward and consistently remind them they need to feel whats right for them. Having pictures of how things ‘should be’ doesn’t serve us in any way.
Beautiful in the simplicity of the birth of understanding.
It’s lovely to read how you could see that your son is your equal and not lesser of a being simply because he is your child. The belief that children are blank and need moulding and have nothing of value to bring to the world until they are moulded is horrible. It’s awesome that theres a blog such as this challenging that norm.
Along with weddings, pregnancy seems to be one of those things that attracts a lot of ‘advice’ from other women. As this blog beautifully presents our body has all the advice we can ever need. If the advice was to be still, tune into and respond to your body, then we would have a lot less stress and feeling like we don’t know in our pregnancies.
This is such a beautiful reminder that we are born into this world already with an innate knowing of what to do and what our purpose is.
This is stunning. What a glorious confirmation of the fact that we DO know, and this was shown to you beautifully by your son. We just have to surrender.
What a beautiful gift children can teach us. Our relationship with them is so sacred and special and reading this makes me deeply appreciate the wisdom they bring and show. Something never to be discounted.
I absolutely loved reading this again as you share so profoundly of the awe available for us to explore in our connection to our bodies and with each other, when we are open and willing to surrender to the truth of what is always on offer. Our interconnectedness is 100% real and you highlight just how much we are guided by a greater love, wisdom and truth that is available to us all through our openness to connect to our bodies first and with each other regardless of age.
We do know how to be a mother even if no one told us what to do, and especially when no one taught us what to do, this connection would be felt and we do know.
Children bring the quality and reflection of innocence for adults to re-member that this quality is only buried within themselves.
A beautiful blog about how to be a mother and to enjoy the process.
I agree and the same applies to fathers too.
I felt very much like this whenI meet my two children, when they where born “The ancient wisdom and still presence this tiny being brought through was extraordinarily powerful.” It is awesome to feel the power and stillness in a new born baby, honouring that which is naturally there in them and all of us has become a life’s work.
I didn’t know this – most description I read were about the baby sleeping or being loud.
A beautiful confirmation of the fact that everything is there within us and all we have to do is let go and surrender; a choice that only I can be aware of in every moment and make.
The bodily communications you receive are quite profound when you are pregnant. I think this was the first time I had given so much attention and care to my body since I was very young. I fell in love with feeling the ever-changing movements within me as well as the changes in the way my body felt. This is such a gift to women to let them feel the magic of being still and body-aware.
This is such a sweet story. When we can let go, get our heads out of the way and simply allow our bodies and nature to do what it needs to do we can see that we are held and supported all the time.
That’s really beautiful. Letting go of the outside influences and trusting that it’s all there before you goes against eh grain of how we have been configured, but it doesn’t take long to settle into what was always natural.
I wonder if it is much easier when we see the child as an equal and whether that is possible?
Our children are certainly magnificent teachers when we allow them to show us the way. Surrendering to this process and not getting caught in pictures of how motherhood should look is crucial if we are to avoid a lot of heartache on both sides.
Well said Helen. If we are open to it, wisdom can always be shared between us regardless of our age.
“I felt amazed and blessed by the power of this bodily communication I was offered by my unborn child – an inner hum that emanated through my every cell, I felt deeply humbled and radiant.” I absolutely love reading about your deep knowing and willingness to claim your bodies communication with you. So inspiring of the depth of knowing that is just there, if, we are willing to surrender and trust ourselves.
We are everything already as is every baby everything already – the only job is to confirm and take it deeper.
When we surrender to the wisdom held within we uncover great learning in the process and our movements thereafter reflect nothing but love that then deepens this knowing. Simply amazing thank you.
“nobody told me he would be my teacher, that this ancient all-knowing being would show me the way” So awesome you came to realise this too many turn a blind eye and ignore the inbuilt wisdom our children have.
I just loved the connection you had with your body that you could feel the pulse and connection of your unborn child throughout every cell. This is extraordinary, but clearly a connection and awareness we are all capable of having, yet due to the lack of it and our tendency to focus outside us instead of within, we are often numb to the enormity of what can be felt. It is a shame we live so far from what is possible but gorgeous to know there is so much more than what we allow should be choose to look the other way.
New born babies are a really great example that the body always knows. Fresh out of the womb, or even on how to get out of the womb – they know in every moment what they are doing. All of this you could say with a brain that has not yet learnt anything – so where does our intelligence come from?
This shows we are just so much more than we have come to believe we are.
I remember feeling very different when I conceived I felt more settled in my body and I felt more serene and worldly it was difficult to explain it then but now I know it to be sacredness as I connected to the woman within.
It is beautiful we do not need to look outside of our body for any answers as the answers are within our body. Everything is given to us in the perfect timing, we just need to be open and surrendered.
I am not a woman who has children, but I do have children in my life, which makes me appreciate how we are all responsible for parenting. I have incredible people in my life who are like ‘parents’ in the way they support me to keep going deeper and being open to even more love. This I truly cherish.
This is an absolute joy to read. Thank you so much for sharing this intimate and ‘wholy’ experience. We are so much greater than we even can imagine.
“In this I opened the door to an influx of advice and information I had previously read and heard about breast-feeding. I had allowed the expectations to creep in, and I felt my body tense up with this feeling that I SHOULD know what to do.” So much advice – often unasked for – floods in when we get pregnant, give birth, breastfeed and parent……. However when we choose to stay connected we do know what feels right for us , our body and our loved ones.
I so love that you were so connected to your body that you knew that you were pregnant. This could be the norm for all of us but many of us have lost this communion with our bodies. Your blog reminds us of what is possible if we choose to stay connected.
I love reading this, it is very gorgeous and shows that all is already known if we just surrender to it.
We are born all knowing, we then communicate that inner knowing out to the world, how awesome it is to have parents who read the child and allow for this natural unfolding.
This is a magnificent confirmation of everything we are but have chosen to forget and instead resort to gathering knowledge and finding solutions, whatever their source.
The fact that our children are such magnificent teachers shows us the cycle of reincarnation, and that in fact their wisdom defies any minor age that can be attributed to them, with such knowing and connection.
This is giving me goose bumps everytime I read it, it is very beautiful. In the past there was not this overload of books, websites, blogs and maybe less family (not sure) to tell you what to do when we were having a child, so it makes sense that we do innately know how to be with these situations and as you say not just we as a mother also the child that is born knows what to do. It makes simple sense to me to actually not need a book etc for that.
It is only in truly meeting another that we truly meet ourselves.
it is beautiful to read how this connection between mother and son is from the first moments of pregnancy and that we are able to feel the prescence of this little human developing inside you. It is magical to feel this and see the huge interconnectedness even with a tiny lump of cells. It is completely debunking the myth of intelligence and the human being coming from our brain.
This is gold – reading it again and having an infant of my own has allowed me to
Appreciate the magnificent wisdom that babies offer us. They are always communicating with us and it is gorgeous to see. I had a mum tell me the other day that babies aren’t trying to be naughty they are just trying to express. And that is so true.
Just gorgeous to read again. I am so loving raising my daughter and seeing how she constantly teaches me and those around me. I watch her so present and determined and she is not put off by anyone. She is herself in full. And it is a gift to observe.
Reading these words; “nobody told me he would be my teacher, that this ancient all-knowing being would show me the way” stopped me for a moment as I considered the wisdom that they contain; wisdom if presented to all mothers preparing for the birth of a child would open the way to a most natural way of being with their child from the first moment. Information from books can be supportive but it can also be confusing and misleading, whereas the innate wisdom that we all hold, in this case that of a new born baby cannot be doubted.
How glorious to experience the love of a mother who appreciates her son to the depths of his soul.
Reading this again this morning has brought a tear to my eye of the wonder of how great we all are. We do so innately know what to do and what not to do as God’s wisdom is in our cells and all we have to do is to listen.
It’s so amazing that babies know how to do this, without anyone having to show them or teach them the ropes… Perhaps we too have a huge amount of wisdom, and should start trusting our feelings & impulses more rather than looking outside of ourselves for answers or instructions as to what to do in situations.
There is something so deeply beautiful that is stirred in my body as I read this, I feel it’s the deep knowing, the other-worldliness we are all very much from, and the communication we each share with one another beyond words.
Surrendering to the Wisdom the body naturally knows is all we need do. If you are in a babies company, you will soon realise they don’t have words but they communicate loud and clear their every need, they know what they feel to eat, when tired or when they want a clean nappy.They are learning to master skills but the Wisdom is innate and a reminder, this is within us all no matter what age.
That is an important thing to remember Vicky, that we all are equally magnificent whether we are freshly born or after living a whole physical life. That what lives within is connected to the same source and is independent and superior to the worldly knowledge we gather through life. This is what we have to foster as the most precious gifts we come with into our lives with which we allow this to grow and expand and to live this connection in full as our normal way of life.
Children can be our greatest teachers in life if we can appreciate them for the grandness the already are when they come down to earth.
I love how much you appreciated what the baby entered the world with, so still and precious and contented. Its obvious that we are not blank slates at birth, there is so much yet to be understood about the science of reincarnation and how it plays out in our lives from day 1.
What a beautiful description of the feeling and knowing you had when you were pregnant. I have never heard it described with such delicateness before and it felt very honouring of such a beautiful time for a woman. I realised that many women may not feel this way and that there is so much more for us to feel and understand about the process of pregnancy
The feeling or expectation that you ‘should’ know something is a killer for allowing yourself to know or be guided naturally by your body. As soon as we doubt or worry, we stop trusting and we close the door on the wisdom that is knocking at all times.
What struck me in rereading this is how we still have that innate ancient wisdom within us. We have just buried it under layers and layers of stuff – hurts, ideals, believes, protection, individualism and so on. As we start getting real, raw and honest with ourselves we can begin shedding some of those layers and seeing the real us – and with that, our ancient wisdom. Don’t throw the baby out with the bath water, for they are here to remind of us of where we come from.
It is indeed amazing how we enter the world and the love we can offer right from the first breath is exquisite. I am so glad to be able to appreciate new life and see the glory, just as you have shared about your new son
This is a beautiful blog reminding us how the answers are within, we are all knowing, we just have to surrender and listen.
We are indeed all teachers and we all know deeply the Wisdom that is there to be read and lived. Birth is not the beginning of this but a continuation of many cycles we have lived, we are indeed ‘ old Souls’ even as a baby.
When I humbly allow myself to listen and see, I know the deep love that my son has offered me. The teaching he gives me smashes all pictures of what teaching is, it is a true opportunity to evolve.
I remember when I had my first child, back then you stayed in hospital for 7 day and every nurse that come in and out of my room would tell me something contradictory to the last when I came to breastfeeding and the care of my baby. The expectations and pressures put on new mothers can be overwhelming if we allow them to be. When we listen to our natural maternal instinct presented through our connection with our body and listen to our baby’s cues the wisdom of parenting naturally flows.
There are so many books, videos, articles, you name it there is something written about every stage of pregnancy and motherhood and raising a child – it can be all too easy to get caught up in it all, losing site of our bodies natural knowing.
So much more can be felt, than is seen. We often get stuck on what we can only touch, see and say….but what about what we feel…I have felt much in life that I have over rode and some I have not. What this article is a great example of is feelings, and honouring them, for life, pregnancy and relationships.
I met a couple of babies this morning. It reminded me they are only ‘new’ on certain levels, such as the physical and developmental, and that we’ve all been here many times before in our different incarnations. There’s a real body-centred wisdom in operation – I could see and feel them sensing the world around them and seeing things most of us have ‘grown out of’. They are truly little energy-discerning packages!
I love that you could feel your child so early on. It astounds me when I hear stories of women not knowing they were pregnant until they gave birth. Can this be so? They must be very disconnected from their bodies if so. Your story demonstrates the potential for the kind of knowingness we can surely all have if we develop enough of a connection with ourselves.
How absolutely beautiful! It’s amazing to allow connection to lead the way.
What I have learnt to love and appreciate about having children in my life is that they systematically break all my fixed beliefs and expectations about so many things: how parenting should be; what family looks like; authority; control; relationships…
It wasn’t always this way I resisted the inevitable for quite some time and consider that the eldest child does have an important role of breaking the parents in… literally!
The magnificence of a newborn child is deeply felt, it is incredible to feel the wisdom we all hold within is already there the moment we enter this earthly plane, it is humbling and calling us to reconnect to this wisdom we hold from ages that passed.
There are so many expectations and pressures put on pregnant women and every one wants to tell them how they should do it: from books, magazines, family members, friends and professionals in this field. When all along they have all the knowing of how to carry their baby by simply connecting with their body, their baby and listening to both the wisdom of the baby and their own as you so beautifully express in this blog.
I am constantly amazed at what my sons teach me and they are so loving and patient with it. Sometimes their honesty is hard to take and I go into the parent role of “i know best” but they are only expressing what is there to be expressed. When I go into the parent role I am hiding from me and I miss out on a beautiful learning opportunity.
When it comes to wisdom and living that, age has no boundaries. I have constantly been inspired by the qualities my sons live… I only ignore what I see when I get lost in ‘I should know better’ because I’m the parent.
Welcoming a new member into the family is an amazing experience and they bring with them so much. Surrendering enough to listen and feel what they show us is one of the greatest lessons in trust.
Wow Lucida this is beautiful, I have tears in my eyes as the love felt between you both and the wisdom you share here is incredible yet so normal.
Your article highlights a question we can ask at any time in our life and that is why should we look outside and give our power away when all along the wisdom is within.
This blog is a true lullaby… I’m reading it just before going to bed and feeling the warmth and love it has been written in.
‘ a moment of joyous repose for us both after hours of surrendering to the movements that would bring him out into the world’. Absolutely gorgeous and beautiful way to bring a new born into this world……
I love the simplicity of this sharing and how we can live very much with the wisdom around us in the young and old and tend to ignore and over ride this rather than looking within.
I agree Vanessa, the age of an individual does not mean anything – we all have everything we need within us 🙂
This is a beautiful sharing which confirms that we as women have an innate knowing which is often different as what we get told.
I know there have been many times in many aspects of my life when I have sought information from outside of myself and trusted that even if it clashed with my inner feelings on something. Our bodies do have an enormous amount of wisdom and intelligence if we surrender to the connection with them.
As we know children are ‘wise beyond their years’. What I have come to appreciate is that once I was also a child and so had that wisdom and in fact have never ‘lost’ it, just buried it. Through the presentations by Serge Benhayon I, like so many others, am regaining connection with that wisdom.
We can often feel a huge sadness in not being a mum, or feel we are not a mum, or not part of being a mother, or blogs like this aren’t relevant to us, when we don’t have children of our own, but this is not true. We are mothers to many many children in our lives, all of who are here to help us to return to grow, walking past a baby in a supermarket can be an opportunity to learn about stillness, seeing a little child shoes at a front door about joy, or the way a child moves freely as a reminder of our natural movements, freedom and lightness in our body.
The simplicity I see in children is immense.
Children are all knowing and wise, we just have to allow them to express all that they are which provides a powerful reflection to all others when we are ready to live that too.
I can relate to how you felt when you became pregnant. I knew I was pregnant way before I used a test. I felt something, I felt a connection, a relationship tat I had not felt before. I depending with myself but also a connection with another, in a very specific way. I felt this delicateness, and openness come through me, and I began to have a taste of what surrender felt like. It took me some months a and huge bout of morning sickness, to really appreciate what surrender meant for my body. That deepening connection has not left, since experiencing it in pregnancy, it has deepened. Once our body knows it, we know it.
This is so beautiful to read, we are allknowing from the moment we set foot in this live. What a trust this gives in our bodies, just let go we don’t need everything to be precisely prepared, when we choose to live from our inner wisdom, it brings a deep trust.
Life is so simple and joyous when we listen to and trust ourselves.
What a game-changer for the world of education! We don’t have to teach little dumb beings how to fit in the world – we are being taught by masters of life how to become that again.
So true and profound Felix; ‘we are being taught by masters of life how to become that again’.
How intensely bombarded we are in regards to ‘how’ we should mother, parent, be a partner, act and behave as both women and men… And how deeply refreshing it is, to read someone’s deeply intimate story of how connection is everything first, and if we remain true to this, we can most surely hold ourselves and not get lost in a sea of ‘should’s’, ‘shouldn’ts’ and what is often quite controlling advice.
My children are all school age now and they continue to teach and guide me as do I them, parenting is a beautiful equal exchange if we allow it.
You may ask what you could possibly learn from a baby – and yet in my limited experiencing nannying a little girl from 6-18 months, there is so much these small people can teach us about love and openness and care – for ourselves and them. I really got to experience hands on how a baby isn’t just a cute bundle of cells waiting to form into a person, they are already a fully aware and complete person and watching that develop and unfold is amazing.
What is so beautiful to read here is the letting go of control and needing to know the answer and allowing the wisdom of the body and the connection to our hearts to guide us.
Yes, Danna, what an empowering blog to read as a young woman, about staying connected to the body’s innate wisdom during pregnancy and childbirth.
“My expectations led me to believe that it was all my job, that I needed to be in control: nobody told me he would be my teacher, that this ancient all-knowing being would show me the way.” We all too readily assume that no-one else is capable of looking after life except us, how glorious to be proved wrong by the innate wisdom of a new born baby.
What a beautiful confirmation and appreciation of you son’s innate wisdom, not making him into a helpless child that has to do what it is told but respecting him in his greatness and magnificence.
I love the wisdom that the body holds. I love how you knew you were pregnant, and I love how your son knew how to breast feed. We really do not need to look outside of ourselves for the answers. It is all there within us if we can but trust.
This was so powerful to read again and connect with how much tension we take on and live in our bodies when we separate from our inner knowing. And this separation always happens through the mind and through taking on a perception of life where we are lost in trying to calculate our next move and so not able to read what we are feeling. Understanding this, it becomes humbling that the intelligence we have come to champion is the very thing we need to change our relationship with.
“However, on reflection I see how I allowed myself to get caught up in the multitude of advice and images.” There is no perfect pregnancy or perfect motherhood, there is only our ability to surrender to the process and deepen our naturally nurturing qualities. What if instead of the ideals and images we hold on to, we focused on supporting pregnant women to tune into and honour everything they feel within and to support them to build a relationship with their growing child so that between them they will always know exactly what to do.
I too was stunned by how much my kids taught me, I had it so wrong when i thought I was the one who would be teaching them everything. it couldn’t be clearer, we are born so so wise and knowing, and need to be raised in a way that knows that already.
Blessed is the parent who knows that they have been offered a beautiful teacher in their child and vice versa, we have much so learn from another within our relationships. Lovely article.
I feel that we all know so much more that we appreciate or are aware of and we have been led to believe that we can only learn from education or from another and in that, we have forgotten to connect to our inner knowing.
There is such a huge consciousness around pregnancy and mothering that women subscribe to, there are so many shoulds and should nots that make up what we think it is to be a good mother. Women have taken on board these ideals for many centuries, a huge burden to carry. However, all the wisdom for a woman is right there inside of her. All we need to do is choose to connect and allow for that natural flow to come through honouring the signposts of the body and letting it lead the way.
Very gorgeous how you have chosen to share about those moments that you could feel a depth of wisdom from within that far out weighed the mass of external shoulds and images fed from the outside. And it is very inspiring to feel the honouring of that in your writing and the perfect foundation that provided for you and your baby.
It is so healing for us all to appreciate the innate wisdom that we have as children and to understand now that what we felt as children was true even though it may not have been affirmed by another at that time. We can now re-imprint this with our own children .
Such a beautiful celebration of your shared connection and inner knowing which when surrendered to gives an inner compass and access to the wisdom of ages that effortlessly trumps any book or image we may hold of what parentlng should look like.
You so beautifully highlight how the more we surrender to the wisdom that comes through connecting to our bodies, the more we are guided to move in a way that is aligned to the Love we all are. For when we forgo this connection, we limit the magnificence and magic that is always present to not only explore and appreciate, but also to embody and live together.
This story is so gorgeous. A powerful confirmation that we don’t need the images and the how to’s from the outside, but it is the depth of our connection with one another that matters and which will soundly guide us through the unfolding in a way that honours everyone.
The connection you experienced with your unborn baby and being able to share it here is a gift to us all, a beautiful account of the wisdom we all hold and can share so easily through connection.
Children have such an inner knowing as to what feels true. If you ask them seriously what they would like to tell adults, 9 times out of 10 they will express that we need to let go and love more!
So lovely and truly inspiring. Thank You for sharing this amazing experience and show how we can trust in this connection and as you say in the teacher that knows right from the start and through the connection and letting go we can just learn and be together.
What an awesome sharing. It so reminded me of that miraculous moment when my babies were born. Our children are born with so much wisdom – we share the journey together. I love releasing the control as I discover this more deeply in my relationship with them daily. You should have heard the wisdom my 7 year old shared the other day after hearing her parents argue – if she’d have charged a counselling fee, I think I would have paid!
I said to my teenage son recently that we are both learning together, I haven’t been a parent of a teenager and he hasn’t been a teenager before…. it was a honest and lovely moment between us, letting go of thinking we need to get it right or know it all and instead trusting what we feel.
“I felt amazed and blessed by the power of this bodily communication I was offered by my unborn child – an inner hum that emanated through my every cell, I felt deeply humbled and radiant.” it is an amazingly confirming time being pregnant, confirming that we are apart of something so much bigger than just what we can see and feel.
I find my children are excellent teachers in a whole manner of ways. Yesterday I was observing how natural and easy it is for them to express love and not hold on to resentments. This was a real inspiration and an invaluable support!
“I can remember opening the curtains one morning, standing still and once again clocking this deep vibration, a fluttering pulse within my body that was strangely unfamiliar yet at the same quite natural, I knew. Turning to my partner, I told him we were having a baby” this alone is the most amazing thing, our whole life can be turned around by appreciating the moments of connection and making them our only way.
My experience of motherhood was similar – I knew the next day that I was pregnant, and, like you, I read every book on parenting and listened to other people’s advice, but in the end it was my children who taught me all I knew. My son had difficulty feeding at first, due to a facial disability so, when my daughter was born, I was thrilled that she latched on straight away. She cried a lot and we had no way of knowing what was wrong. Looking back from where we are now, she was ten when she was diagnosed with a wheat intolerance by a complementary medicine practitioner, and as I was eating a lot of bread and gluten at the time I was breast feeding her, it is possible that she was suffering from a permanent headache all the time. Taking responsibility for children certainly means caring for ourselves first, especially being careful what we eat and drink.
It’s very powerful when we surrender to trusting ourselves – we do innately know what’s next. Using the mind trying to find the answers often only brings in complication.
This is absolutely gorgeous to read. I have felt huge tension and even slight panic whenever I put myself under the expectation that I should know but, like a new born baby reflects to us, there is an universal order that runs through us all that we can rely on 100% to communicate what is next if we but allow it.
I may try controlling my life but I’m appreciating how often I am surrendering to this order and how at ease one can be in the world. To no longer fret about a meeting and how to solve a situation from studying theories or policy, or thinking through endless possible scenarios and rehearsals of possible solutions. Allowing myself to read what is being communicated and responding. It feels like being held by God living this way.
To have seen your son from the moment he was born for all that he is, and then to raise him with that knowing is very special – to know he has blessed your life and you have blessed his.
It’s amazing to me that anyone who has hung out properly with a child can deny re-incarnation. They have the wisdom of lifetimes.
We are all unique and complete miracles, born with inner knowing and intelligence. Nature lives like this every moment of the day, they don’t forget their true purpose or way. And we call ourselves intelligent. It seems to me that we forget that we are already everything and connected to a source that confirms us, to substitute with text books and linear thinking. It’s a blessing babies don’t read and take this stuff on too early. The choice is too never take it on at all.
As a parent of two kids myself, I can say that they have taught me at least as much about love and life as I have them.
Isn’t amazing that all the most loving and best advice in the world cannot match the innate wisdom that resides in a new born baby. It proves beyond doubt that there is a knowing within our bodies that will constantly guide us to nurture, care and connect with one another. Returning to this knowing when we are adults can feel challenging but its not impossible, as our bodies always retain this innate primary directive, we just need to allow ourselves to feel and honour it.
I adored being pregnant with my three children too. I enjoyed observing the changes taking place in my body and feeling womanly. Each birth was different but truly amazing. The functioning of our bodies is incredible.
‘nobody told me he would be my teacher, that this ancient all-knowing being would show me the way’ it feels like these wise words would have been naturally shared from elders in years gone by and that somehow with our disconnection and separation we have lost all this.
The belief that we have to teach our newborns everything is as you share not true. There is a wisdom inside babies that is beyond this life alone, this makes it more a working together than a ‘I am going to teach you everything’ relationship. This is the most beautiful way to live together.
As Serge Benhayon has expressed “our bodies belong to the Universe”. No where is this more telling when we watch nature’s wise impulses.
It is miraculous that new borns and the young know exactly how to feed, breathe and smile too, without any instruction or guidance… They are incredibly intelligent in the truest sense of the word.
“I had allowed the expectations to creep in, and I felt my body tense up with this feeling that I SHOULD know what to do.” Expectations are such a ‘killer’ of the connection we all have to the wisdom of the Universe.
It is about to surrender to the fact that our bodies do know, not matter how long we have lived our lives on this earth. When we go to our minds instead we get lost in the complexity and leave our body unattended that leads to a hard and tensioned body.
“We are all born teachers”… What a beautiful and powerful statement. This is what is truly needed for us all to know. When that is eventually known our world will change.
It has been a powerful experience for me when I noticed that I felt something with certainty and what I felt was quite different from what I thought I should feel.
I know that when my mum describes carrying and giving birth to me, she has the same love and wonder. Being raised with this total love and being seen for the amazing person you are from the word go is a beautiful way to grow up.
This is just gorgeous – for our children to be our teachers. The role of a mother had taught us to be in control – but control stops us from observing and allowing. This blog is a testament to simply allowing and the magnificence it brings. Babies know so much and will show it to us in full if we allow it and see them as equals.
This so beautifully shows how women instinctively know what is needed for them and their baby, and how a woman and her baby work together in a joyous rythmn to work out what is true for them.
This is an important topic to talk about as there are so many expectations and pictures placed on mothering and fathering, so its great to discuss this and start to break it down.
There is so much in this blog to appreciate and be inspired by. And as a woman who hasn’t given birth to a child I feel inspired to deepen and deepen forever more my own inner connection, and to be in constant communion with the wisdom that resides in my body.
How much we have lost this knowing as a society and as women… And as children being dismissed as those that don’t yet know because they haven’t as yet amassed the knowledge. How far away we have strayed from the universal wisdom that is our true glory and that is in our bodies from the day we are born to the day we die and beyond.
It’s true than many new mothers put pressure on themselves thinking they should automatically know how to care for their first child, but asking for support shouldn’t be approached as an embarrassment or confession of bad parenting as it makes complete sense for women to connect with other women who have had children before, who can help them to develop a relationship with their newborn where they can feel what’s needed to care for them.
Such a beautiful and poignant blog acknowledging the vastness of our inner knowing and yet how we can get diverted by images and expectations and give ourselves so much unnecessary grief. You convey the wonder and joy of it all so well and I loved your description of the bodily communication as ‘an inner hum that emanated through my every cell, I felt deeply humbled and radiant.’
There are a lot of messages concerning pregnancy, birth and having babies, I remember when my daughter was very young, I said to my husband, from a feeling, if we don’t feel for ourselves how to parent then we will be lost in the advice, so much contradicts itself. Feeling the relationship and connection and living from that is the only way to truly honour what is being shared.
I agree, age and knowledge, may be of of significance in some ways, but for me, wisdom is within us all, and babies arrive on this earth with heaps of it and express it with simplicity and divinity. We are all equally students and teachers in this life.
So beautifully written, the flow and grace is joy to read. The content is also sublime, we find teachers all around us, I know I have found divine teachers through sharing with and observing my children.
“I felt the expectations and pressures there are for pregnant women to know exactly how to care for their child: the image that I should be the one in charge, the primary carer. ” There are so many images of ‘the perfect mother and baby’ out there, perpetuated by the media. Even in 2016 the expectations are that the mother should be the primary care-giver, as you say. With today’s reduction in the closeness of extended family nearby the media have stepped into the breach. Yet even after only a few hours the mother is the expert on her baby, and should trust her feelings on how things are progressing. Given support and encouragement women can blossom as mothers once their confidence has grown. And relationships are always a two way thing – so listening to our children and their wisdom is key.
There are so many gorgeous qualities our children have and reflect to us that we as adults have forgotten.
This is beautiful, really beautiful!
The wisdom we hold as women and children is rarely mentioned let alone given due attention. Your blog is deeply confirming to all of us, who know what we know, but are yet to trust our inner most feelings. Thank you.
Truth of birth in words as simple as these – tell the world that the way that we have written, talked and decided things will be a certain way are not in fact the way at all. It seems we have lost the truth in a mountain of thinking. It was a blessing to read this and feel the simplicity of the never ending cycle we are all in.
This is an incredibly Divine reflection of what being guided by Love truly means. With no separation as to who ‘should’ be the one to ‘know it all’, there is an absolute honoring and surrender to the connection of Love between you. The oneness of Love is allowed to flow through your bodies, with it the wisdom that each of your bodies hold is presented at the time it is needed, for you both to move onward together with Love. That is the power and magic of Love, a magnificence beyond measure that is available to us all.
It is crazy really, that when you truly look at it closely, all the information, ideals and pictures that are imposed on women during pregnancy are stem from a place that ‘we do not know’ what to do, seeded from a lack of connection to ourselves and our bodies. It would be far more supportive and empowering for women to be guided to develop and build a connection to herself and her baby through her body, and be guided by our inner-knowing, of what is needed for both to move in a loving and caring way.
Our bodies are markers of truth, and when we listen to the messages they offer there is a wisdom we can connect to that supports us in whatever our bodies need at that time.
It is very true that our children teach us and the power of the relationship we have with them is built on a deep appreciation in this awareness. It is deeply freeing to express without the very binding pictures of motherhood, and in the honesty of my child, this is communicated every time when the ideal of motherhood has sneaked in our interactions, what deep love truly can be lived between parents and children.
What a beautiful photo – it only illuminates the appreciation in every word.
The beauty of our relationships with children is that they often remind us of wisdom we have chosen to forget.
I love how this woman describes her experience with having a child in such a holy way. I would have loved to have the understanding she did many years ago when having my family. Its so empowering.
I am so glad you wrote this, its such a wonderful offering for women around the world to be blessed by,
enormously healing to read it and alllow its wisdom into my life.
Thank you
We are bombarded with ideas and ideals on how to care for our babies and in my case I choose to bombarded myself with books, classes and general research on the subject. I remember when I had my first, I was telling my mother exactly how much ‘tummy time’ my baby needed on he’s tummy each time he woke, I remember she laughed at the fact they had come up with a name for putting your child on the ground for a play.
I would time each breast feed and wondered or panicked when things didn’t go to plan. I am so different in my approach to parenting now but when we lack inner trust and knowing we can get very fixated on making things more complicated than they need to be.
“…my baby showed me that I need not look outside for the answers but know that they are already within.” – what a beautiful lesson.
’However, on reflection I see how I allowed myself to get caught up in the multitude of advice and images.’ – Thank you for highlighting this important point, we grow up learning that it is normal and natural to follow images and advices in our lives, when truth is we all have a natural inner guidance when we allow ourselves to listen within.
What a beautiful moment to let go of the ‘should’s and trust in knowing that just being is all that is needed… for it is within that that all the wisdom you should ever need is at your disposal.
What a delicious expression of what it can be like when we let go of the images we accept without questioning the damage they do to our innate knowing of what is needed together as mother and child. Beautiful.
I love love love this line: “My expectations led me to believe that it was all my job, that I needed to be in control: nobody told me he would be my teacher, that this ancient all-knowing being would show me the way.” And I can see how this is everywhere in life. I do not have to know/control everything – we will rock this world together. All I have to do is just be me. The rest will unfold.
Every expectation that we have, every pre-conceived image that we hold, every ideal that we have aligned to, every belief that he hold tight….all of these close our eyes to what is truly there to be seen.
It’s articles like this that antenatalgroups should be reading to prospective mums as this with medical support is all that is needed for the whole journey of pregnancy, birth and post natal care.
It amazing what an industry babies have become – you need only go to a bookshop to see the hundreds of different books all offering different ways of how you should do it. The greatest ‘book’ is our innate knowing!
The magic of that moment when my baby snuffled her way, without any involvement from people me, to latch on is something I will never forget. Her knowing of exactly what was needed for her to find nourishment whilst I trusted felt very powerful. It is this same powerful inner knowing that I am learning to trust again as I learn to look within.
Similarly, Leigh, I think we spent a lot of time – certainly at the beginning – in disbelief and through that probably a lack of connection. And that connection is not just for mum-to-be, but for dad-to-be as well. It’s so lovely to read this writing and reflection. An inspiring way to be, regardless if you’re a parent or not.
It is truly a miracle. And the whole process absolutely blew me away. Of course I knew the process, but to live and connect to it and then to see a little person come through, it blew my mind! What a miracle.
Having recently become a father, to a little boy I can relate to what you’ve said about how they become your teacher. There’s nothing there to hold them back, no hurts, no self doubt, no protection – and it is a constant example/reminder of how we can live. He’s taught me to become more gentle, tender, present and patient – what wise little beings. It’s easy to think of them as helpless little babes, but it’s far from the truth.
Absolutely gorgeous to read. We can all learn so much from each other by working together.
Its beautiful to hear such a personal account of the innate wisdom we can all feel in human beings from the day they are born. It reminds me that we are all equal, no matter what age or gender and of the divine soul that inhabits us all.
Beautifully lyrical sharing of the wisdom of God.
It is interesting that most of us are not knowing of this natural wisdom of a new born as if this would be a common knowing mothers would be more relaxed and would not feel all this pressure.
This is magnificent and confirms that we are all born teachers and bring with us everything that is truly needed. How come we abandon this innateness for the sake of insecurity, doubt and anxiety?
How important it is for us to trust our inner knowingness when we have a newborn, the deep connection between a mother and her child is quite innate, and if she trusts this, then she will know how to care for her child. The key is for the mother to connect deeply to herself, this will deepen that connection to her child, which is a truly wonderful bond where she knows what is needed moment to moment.
Within those little bodies are many life’s lived, and wisdom of the ages to share.
This beautiful blog shows to me there is a different way to be in this world when we let go of the pictures that bind us to how it should/could be, and allow it to be. Thank you.
Amazing blog, ‘we are all born teachers’, this is certainly true. When we appreciate this, there is not one ounce of judgment or frustration that can creep in to our lives but pure wisdom to be lived and shared.
This is so gorgeous to read, and feel the deep trust and wisdom babies can bring to this world. They know what they are here to do, and so we all do, from the day we were born.
A beautiful appreciation of your son – how much love and wonderment there is in every word.
Wow what a stunning reflection to us all of the knowing we can all surrender to.
Every time I meet a newborn baby it brings tears to my eyes to feel the absolute ancient wisdom that is so easily felt because they have not yet put up filters or barriers of protection. It is a beautiful reminder to me that this is who we all are naturally and can choose to return to in any moment. Drop the protection, drop the barriers and let the world see us in our natural vulnerability and let the wisdom shine through.
This is a beautiful reminder for me too Donna. When we meet a baby, a child or an adult that communicates to us without any form of protection we can feel the beauty, joy and love they emanate, so naturally. I have seen people who carry their body in huge protection let down their guard when they meet babies and children who are open, joyful and loving. It reminds us that we are all naturally this way too.
Beautifully said, Donna. We need only look at a baby or young child and see how they are, how they play and live to see that there is no protection. I think many people don’t consider that and see it as ‘just a kid being a kid’. But it is a beautiful reflection of how we can be.
‘Mothering’ is a package of ideals sent from the astral plane (all that is not love and truth) in order to thwart the unfolding light of nurturing that all women have, sent straight from Heaven.
What a stunning account of becoming a mother. You allow me to feel the ways in which I have used knowledge to my own detriment. As with all things in life it is not for us to know every step that must be taken, however, if we read what is going on around us we will always know the next step to take.
How I love this beautiful recollection of those first few moments. I too have been in awe of the learnings I have received from my children, how naturally they have known and how simply they have shared. Staying with the connection and the simplicity would have been much simpler than letting ideals and expectations get in the way.
It’s true that children can teach us incredible lessons – even from very young there’s a lot to learn from how they interact with us and how they respond to what’s happening around them.
‘..nobody told me he would be my teacher, that this ancient all-knowing being would show me the way.’ What a gift this is for all mothers, mothers to be and to our greatest of teachers – our children. Magnificent indeed.
Gorgeous story, one I can completely relate to with the birth and breast feeding process of my son. My son showed me he naturally knew how to suckle and it was a natural bonding and connection between us. An unspoken language of love.
When life naturally flows you shouldn’t want to miss a minute. When we try and mold life every minute is torture.