How We Dress … Why having Pictures does not Suit us

I went shopping the other day for some nice warm vests or sweaters. I have been having some trouble finding one as I find the fashion at the moment very ‘baggy’ for women. With that I mean that it is very wide and does not show much of our bodies. I would find myself wondering often if the clothing I had in my hands was really a size S or that it was tagged wrong? (It would be the first one – really a size S.)

So I did go out a little hesitant with the knowing there would be a lot of these stylish ‘body hiding’ vests out there. And yes, there were a lot of oversized shirts and vests. Nevertheless, I felt like giving it a go and got myself a pile of sweaters and vests to try, taking the smallest possible size in the hope it would show a bit of my body shape.

I tried them all on and they were all quite big, yet one of them fitted my body well, so that was simple, I would take that one, but I wanted one more. It was curious to find that I really liked one of them… a wide one!

I was not fully understanding this but this ‘wide’ one just felt really yummy and warm on my body and actually… with a skinny legging it looked really delicious. I felt very feminine, warm, cozy and ‘me’.

I bought the two.

The day after I tried the new wide jumper on again with some nice jeans and… did not like it at all! It was too wide and hiding my body. I was a bit disappointed and put it back in the bag to bring back to the store after the weekend.

It kept inviting me though and I tried it on several more times and hey! One day with certain pants it looked and felt amazing again.

Lieke Campbell Gorgeous Top 2017

What I found was that I had observed that women’s clothing is often not very confirming of the beauty we naturally are and that there are many women hiding their bodies in big clothes, maybe not because they like to, but because it is the fashion at the moment. I felt women could be wearing more confirming and beautiful clothes, me included.

Yet… I did make this into a picture! No wide clothes at all for me! I found this is too rigid and does not allow me to express from how I am feeling. It might be that a little wider well-fitting jumper is perfect for the day and actually looks very sexy on because it is an expression of me.

With having a picture, we miss out on these kinds of expressions of ourselves and shopping can become very frustrating and very boring. I found as well that dressing towards the picture will never give me that ‘wow, I LOVE this’ feeling, yet shopping without the picture and being open to anything does, because one, I found not all ‘oversized’ clothes are hiding the body, neither is it right to wear a tight shirt every day, and two, that it is a joy to just shop and try what I like in the moment, a bit of playful fun, and it might end up looking amazing beyond what I had ‘pictured’ to be possible.

So it is great to be aware of the huge amount of ‘oversized’ clothes and that they are not always there to support women in their beauty, but it is equally important to not dress towards any picture or ideal, or make it into a rule, so we can be open to expressing ourselves; dressing ourselves to show and celebrate the absolute gorgeous women we are.

By Lieke Campbell, 26, Student of Dentistry, Ghent, Belgium 

You may also enjoy:

Do we dress for ourselves or another …  Cherise shares her joy in how she dresses.

Can we dress to be the beauty we are  … yes we can Kate explores how there are no rules to what we wear.

Fashion styling is about being truly you – not “making yourself over” but instead feeling, meeting and bringing your innermost beauty with what you choose to wear.

626 thoughts on “How We Dress … Why having Pictures does not Suit us

  1. I’ve always said I hated shopping but that’s because I go with a picture, it never gets satisfied and I leave empty-handed. When shopping without an expectation I tend to find things I never expected to buy, love them and constantly ware them!

  2. This is something I am starting to go with more, go with the feeling of something first and then how it looks. Also stopping and asking myself am I really going to wear it as many times I have bought something and then never worn it!

    1. Yes, asking if we are really going to wear it is important. I now just don’t buy something when I have to imagine something to like the piece of clothing I have before me. Like imagining myself wearing it and how it will change my life etc etc. then I definitely know it is not true and just a picture. Because our clothes are an expression of ourselves and our beauty but they are never the beauty themselves, that has to come from us.

  3. The pictures we hold can completely debilitate our bodies, one day we will feel attractive and on top of the world because we fit the pictures and the next we will feel completely smashed, fat & ugly because we do not. The antitode is to connect to our true beauty, the one that has nothing to do with the outside & then no matter what we will feel content, beautiful & attractive.

  4. I dressed for me today after reading your blog! I wore a dress and each time I moved away from my self and walked around I was reminded of how I chose what I was going to wear and feel like I had a little bit of heaven with me 💫

  5. What is so beautiful is that each day we may need to wear a different dress or jumper to express what is needed for that day and it is an opportunity to connect with what is within waiting to come out.

  6. We are constantly being fed pictures all the time of how we should dress what clothes we should wear what make up we should put on, and so we loose our own identity and our own expression of what is true for us. I remember as a child being very aware of clothes and what I liked and didn’t like based on how they felt I would know instantly what worked for me, but as I got older I was not always so discerning in how the clothes felt and was more concerned how they looked. Now I am very much first and foremost about how clothes feel energetically and from there decide if the clothes work for me or not.

    1. We have to be governed by what we can feel on the inside of us and not what’s on the outside because it’s on the inside of us that the truth can be felt, whereas the outside of us is littered with lies. Lies upon lies upon lies, stacked up and layered as far as the eye can see.

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