My Journey with my Periods – Discovering Cycles 

It has been nearly 7 years since my first period at the age of 13 and since then I have been on an amazing journey in my relationship with myself as a woman. During those years there were many changes taking place – it is generally known and accepted that puberty is a big time for teenagers as their physical body and hormones shift, but with the support of Esoteric Women’s Health and Universal Medicine practitioners, this time has been far more than a biological change for me – it has been an amazing journey where I have blossomed from a girl into a woman.

Rebecca - My Period Journey, Discovering Cycles

From almost my very first period, I suffered with extreme crippling pain and sickness. For the first few years my periods would be very heavy and would have me flat on my back in bed for several days, unable to stand, let alone go to school – I simply couldn’t function normally because of the pain I was in, and the sickness, shaking and fatigue that went along with the pain. Some months whilst screaming in agony, my mum seriously considered taking me to hospital to get some morphine to help with the pain.

I often worried what would happen if my periods never got any better and I wondered how so many women carried on their normal lives with painful periods. At the time, the only solution I was given by the doctors was to take the contraceptive pill – I wouldn’t be in any pain, but then again I also wouldn’t have periods. It might sound strange, but despite the pain and the sickness, I didn’t want to take medication to completely stop an innate and natural part of me being a woman – I wanted to find a way for my periods to be naturally less painful, and so I decided to seek some help from some of the women in my life. In particular, I decided to book myself in for some sessions with Natalie Benhayon, who is a practitioner that specialises in Esoteric Women’s Health.

Natalie is an amazingly wise young woman, and her support was very practical, sharing from her own experiences, not only as a young woman herself, but also from the hundreds of women she treats and supports on a daily basis in her work as a practitioner. Esoteric Women’s Health to me simply means reconnecting back to what it means to be and live as a woman from within me – not based on all the measures and pictures in life, but from a connection with myself.

Through her support, and the support of other practitioners, I began to look at and take responsibility for the way I was living on a daily basis as a woman – and in a nut shell what it showed me was that I wasn’t living as a woman, I was just walking around as a human, totally ignoring and overlooking the fact I have a woman’s body, and I am a woman first and foremost in all that I do.

When I look at some of the role models in my life of amazing women like Natalie Benhayon, I can see that in every way, from how they dress, do their hair, talk, walk or work they bring qualities to life of the woman they are.

It is not about what they looked like, but more the fact that how they live is with an awareness of and a connection to the fact that they are women.

How often does it simply become auto-pilot to wear makeup and do our hair? How often do we dress ourselves and choose clothes that make us feel amazing, and because we feel amazing we naturally look it? I can’t count the number of times I have painted my nails because it’s just another thing you do, and because I am not really taking any time or care I always rush and smudge the polish.

But did it go deeper than that?
Was there a part of me that was rejecting living as a woman in life?

I was at the point in my life where I was growing from a girl to a woman, and in me I could feel a lot of resistance to this transition – I wanted to stay the little girl, not responsible and not on the receiving end of all the attention, comparison and measuring I was already feeling in the world – measuring myself to other girls at school, to pictures in the media, feeling the eyes of men on me and the pressure to be in a relationship. I could feel I didn’t want to grow up and become the woman that I was seeing modelled by society and so there was an inner tug of war going on between the natural call and transition to being a woman and the part of me that was applying the brakes and not wanting to go there.

I realized that this way of living, so disconnected and resistant to myself as a woman and just ticking the boxes, was bound to have an effect – could it be the intense pain and sickness of my period was showing me a month lived disconnected to and fighting myself?

Could it be possible that my period was having to clear the build-up of tension and lack of care in my body from the month?

As I became more aware of the way I lived I decided to start to track my cycles and symptoms using a period diary app called Our Cycles. The very simple act of actually recording when my periods started and ended every month, which days were heavier and which were lighter and what days I got cramps or other symptoms, slowly built a very uncomplicated and practical connection with this aspect of myself as a woman. As the months passed and my awareness built I would know when my period was due from the way my body was feeling, because I had taken the time to feel and track the symptoms in my diary. No longer was I left wondering why I suddenly felt more tired than normal, or why I was really craving sugar out of nowhere, or why my breasts or lower back was sore. When I felt these things I could connect them back to where I was in my cycle, and see them as the symptom or end product of how I had been living up till that point.

What I discovered was that, over time, my periods got lighter, shorter and less painful – I could tell you one week before and the day before my period started that it was coming, based off this new found relationship with my body – it was amazing!

Through this very simple tool of keeping track of my cycle, I had developed the beginnings of a very practical relationship with myself as a woman and in doing that, it eased some of the tension in me around growing up and becoming a woman… but there was still far more to go.

For several years I lived with periods that were so far improved from the pain I had experienced before, that a little pain here and there didn’t worry me – I could take some painkillers and get through it, and occasionally if I had a bad period it would typically only be for the first day.

I then attended some presentations delivered by Natalie Benhayon, who presented something deeper for me and other women to consider … Natalie spoke about ovulation, and for me it was one of the first times I had heard it discussed outside sex ed. or biology.

Did I know when I ovulated? The answer was a complete no; in fact I didn’t even know what ovulating really looked like or felt like on a purely physical level.

Natalie shared about ovulation openly and honestly so that it totally demystified it and in the end I was actually able to say that I did experience symptoms of ovulating, I had just never known enough to connect the dots and know that was what was happening.

And so I implemented the same program as with my periods, a very simple recording every month of this other aspect of my cycle, just to purely learn what my body’s normal was, and then from several months’ observation I could begin to tell when it was different. I tentatively began to explore the relationship between the kind of ovulation I had, how aware of it I was, and the kind of period that followed. How did I live in the cycle of the month, that may have affected my physical cycle?

What I discovered was that no part of my life was separate or disconnected from any other part – the physical cycle of my body was not separate to the cycle of the month or the day and how I lived in those cycles – I couldn’t push hard and just get everything done, placing myself second in life and not feel the fact in my period.

As time passed I realised that becoming a woman is far more than a physical change – that is a part of it but I also feel I have grown into a woman on many other levels. It has taken time, and through my teenage years I have learnt a lot about what it means to me to be a woman and how I express – I have tried fitting in and matching the pressure of school or the media, I have pulled away and tried to be more masculine, going hard and pushing through but in the end, the foundation I had with me the whole time was a very simple but profound connection to myself and my cycle. Around me I had amazing reflections from women like Natalie, showing me it was possible to be a beautiful, powerful woman without having to toe the line and fit the picture.

For someone who started off their journey with their periods shaking and crying on the bathroom floor in utter agony, to have come so far where having deepened and developed my relationship with myself as a woman has lead me to not only have relatively painless and symptomless periods, but a point where I feel I can say that I know who I am as a woman is amazing.

Thanks to the support of Natalie Benhayon and other practitioners, puberty for me has not just been a biological process, or a struggle – it has been an unfoldment out from within me what was already there, and in that process I have healed my own physical symptoms in the way that I live.

I look forward to a life spent unfolding my relationship with myself and the world as a woman.

By Rebecca, UK

You may also Enjoy:

What is Our Cycles period diary?
Hear from Sara Harris on the phases of our menstrual cycles
What are periods really about?

454 thoughts on “My Journey with my Periods – Discovering Cycles 

  1. “Could it be possible that my period was having to clear the build-up of tension and lack of care in my body from the month?”

    Yes of course, this makes so much sense, medication can help but only on a superficial level – whats needed always is to look within and to change movements that create illness and pain.

  2. Gosh what if all teenagers had access to this wisdom, care and love that would be pretty amazing in fact it should be the normal. I love your honesty here ‘I was just walking around as a human, totally ignoring and overlooking the fact I have a woman’s body, and I am a woman first and foremost in all that I do.’ how often do we truly connect with who we are within rather than just be a human functioning day in and day out. What you have shared here is really important and key for our whole and true well being.

  3. I love knowing more about cycles and connecting with my own.
    What an amazing body we have, if we listen we are reminded of our connection to the universe and the grandness of it all.

  4. “Could it be possible that my period was having to clear the build-up of tension and lack of care in my body from the month?” This is so amazing and makes so much sense, and also reminds me of the absolute amazingness of our bodies and innate wisdom they hold.

  5. When we feel and get a sense of the symptoms our period is offering us, do we listen and take heed or do we ignore and dismiss them because we make our life about the ‘doing’ and everything in life rather than the relationship we have with ourselves.

  6. Growing up and entering puberty i never considered that our body lives in cycles. I could see the cycles around us, and see patterns for myself during the day or different seasons – but it never occured to me that my body is governed by cycles. Introduced to me by Natalie Benhayon, I have now began to develop this relationship and it is just so beautiful – I can feel my body going from one stage into the next, preparing for what is to come and discarding what has happened. It’s a real gift to have this relationship, one which I would wish upon every single woman.

  7. It is fascinating connecting and listening to what our bodies and cycles are communicating to us. For us to be oblivious to this is such a shame, like you until I was at a presentation with Natalie Benhayon shared and I got full clarity of what each phase of our cycle is offering us as women not only on the physical and functional level but also the energetic level to.

  8. “Could it be possible that my period was having to clear the build-up of tension and lack of care in my body from the month?”

    Yes and if only collectively as a society we acknowledge it, never again would there be shame in having a period.

  9. I love this and am exploring this for myself. It’s great to really get to know our own cycles and then be able to notice when something is out or different. I am at the moment learning that when something is different it does not mean I did something wrong but that there is something for me to look at without that judgement.

  10. “Esoteric Women’s Health to me simply means reconnecting back to what it means to be and live as a woman from within me.” Simple but so profound.

  11. As a parent of an eleven year old girl I am becoming aware of the importance of addressing what comes up and is going on for our girls no matter what it is. To feel this connection with my daughter comes from a connection to myself and my willingness to commit to and love me.

  12. The way we are taught to live as women is heartbreaking, we glorify the fact that women can be tough, we encourage young girls to compete and all of these ingrained behaviours leave women feeling incomplete, lacking a worth and in many self-abusive habits. If we truly care for the health of women, why have we come to this as a society?

  13. A gorgeous and very honest sharing Rebecca, this blog could have been my own journey as well with my period as I had similar experiences as you, I often wonder where I would be now if I didn’t have the reflection of women like Natalie Benhayon living as a true and sacred woman, and the amazing support she offers with Esoteric Women’s Health and the ‘our cycles’ app, it has simply been life changing.

  14. “But did it go deeper than that?
    Was there a part of me that was rejecting living as a woman in life?” All women would be wise to consider this most deeply.

  15. These days you hear of so many women hating having periods and then having a tough time through the menopause – personally, I never had either. I put this down to never hating my periods or resisting menopause.

  16. “It has been nearly 7 years since my first period at the age of 13 and since then I have been on an amazing journey in my relationship with myself as a woman”. It is a crime that this statement is an exception rather than the norm. We diminish this time into a purely biological thing, a time when you could get pregnant and learn that periods are at best an inconvenience. This journey should be a time of flowering into a woman and embracing the beauty of what that means.

  17. Our relationship with difficulty, pain and our body has been completely corrupted. The addictions we have threaten us with pain but yet cause so much more the longer they are entertained.

  18. Getting to know ourselves from an inner connection changes how we treat and hold ourselves as a woman and we are able to bring a quality to the way in which we do anything when we come from how we are feeling within our body and in honouring the truth of that feeling.

  19. What a beautiful understanding you came to with support from your practitioners, ‘ I began to look at and take responsibility for the way I was living on a daily basis as a woman – and in a nut shell what it showed me was that I wasn’t living as a woman, I was just walking around as a human, totally ignoring and overlooking the fact I have a woman’s body, and I am a woman first and foremost in all that I do.’

  20. It is beautiful to read this article, I love the way that you were supported to know yourself as a woman.

  21. “Could it be possible that my period was having to clear the build-up of tension and lack of care in my body from the month?” Ah ha! a million light bulbs come on this makes so much sense – I wish to share this knowing with all the women in the world.

  22. “puberty for me has not just been a biological process, or a struggle – it has been an unfoldment out from within me what was already there, and in that process I have healed my own physical symptoms in the way that I live.” so beautifully shared Rebecca, a very inspiring reflection your experience presents to young women.

  23. ‘an unfoldment out from within me what was already there’ what an amazing way to spend your teenage years (or indeed any years) growing and sharing you with the world, and knowing it’s all there ready and waiting to be expressed.

Leave a comment

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.