What is Your Relationship with Your Breasts?

When was the last time you stood in front of a mirror, naked, and looked at your breasts?

When was the last time you stood in front of a mirror, naked, and looked at your breasts, absolutely without any judgement?

When was the last time you washed and moisturised your breasts with the tenderness, equal if not greater to holding a newborn baby?

When did you last care for your breasts the way you care for your face?

viktoria-a-tender-rose

It is well worth stopping and pondering on these questions…

So, how do we see our breasts? 

Do we feel them to be a source of nurture and femininity or do we look at them and judge their perkiness (or the lack of), size (too small, too big), and shape (not oval enough, too flat…)?

OR

Do we flaunt them in front of men and women to show how we ‘feel womanly’ and get the attention we are needing?

How many of us women can really say that we appreciate our breasts for what they truly are, just as they are and for what might they bring to this world that is not related to breastfeeding or sex? Or are we constantly bashing ourselves for not having the playboy cover boobs of the pornography and the female featuring cartoon industry?

There is much talk about loving our bodies and so much out there about loving the size you’re in and that everyBODY is beautiful, which includes breasts. However, have we stopped to consider just how that applies to breasts? I mean if one woman can’t even on the physical level have the same two breasts, how did we develop the expectations of a perfect shape or size breasts?

So why so little (if any at all) care for our breasts?

  • Because we don’t have Breast Cancer?
  • Because we haven’t (yet) been hit in the face with the truth about how we are living every day?

How much hardness we are walking around in and how deep the disregard we hold our bodies in is, as well as how atrocious our arrogance is, with the mentality of “if it’s not in my life therefore it doesn’t concern me” – the way of thinking that is literally killing us.

But boy oh boy how foolish are we? We haven’t fully stopped to consider that ‘no (wo)man is an island’ and that every single one of us plays a part in the whole. That Breast Cancer in the lives of millions of women concerns us ALL, women and men, not just those affected and their families, friends …

What if the real truth is that potentially we all bear Breast Cancer? 

Breast cancer does not, cannot just occur over night. Every loveless choice we make, all the abuse we might allow, the lack of self-care, self-loathing, disregard for self-nurturing in our lives, every time we look at our breasts and judge them, insult them, or do not appreciate them we could be taking steps towards developing Breast Cancer.

So what else needs to happen for us women to realise that a life of self-loathing is killing us day after day?

That every single one of us has the power to not allow breast cancer to run riot by putting breast care and self-care on top of our list of priorities. So let’s start by being more caring, deeply nurturing, super loving, with us and our breasts, and see how Breast Cancer likes that.

Let’s just see.

By Viktoria Stoykova, Student, UK

You may also Enjoy:

A Women’s magazine delivering its readers a diverse view to explore openly and honestly all the issues that truly matter to women  … read more on their edition on Breast Care

Self nurturing a key ingredient in Breast Cancer support … inviting women to consider the importance of deeply caring for themselves.

We take a huge step in our evolution when we stop rejecting self; when we stop rejecting our body and the love that we were born with Preventing Breast Cancer – Changing how we feel about our Bodies

 

362 thoughts on “What is Your Relationship with Your Breasts?

  1. No illness or disease occurs over night – there is always some form of choice we make over a period of time that is contributing to the development of the illness or disease…at least this is my understanding. Some more obvious cases are the choice to smoke and the increased likelihood of developing lung cancer – this is a no-brainer. And when we eat poorly and don’t look after ourselves we are more likely to develop heart disease or diabetes for example. The list goes on, and the WHS also states that a large percentage (around 80%) of all illness and disease are what are called ‘preventable’ and related to lifestyle factors. But then in addition there is also so much more to illness and disease than just eating and exercising, for we see elite athletes who have the best medical teams and nutritionists etc working with them and yet they too develop cancers or other conditions. There is much to ponder on here, and if we are open to the fact that our choices on an every day basis and the way we choose to live our lives in terms of a connection with ourselves is also a large contributer to this situation, then we have much to explore together and this can certainly broaden our understanding even further.

  2. A few years ago I had some Ultrasounds done on my breasts and they discovered some cysts – I was told most women have them and it’s pretty ‘normal’. But what is normal about this? What is normal about having sore breasts around the cycle? I don’t feel this is normal, and I appreciate what Viktoria is saying here with the fact that our choices matter as women for there is an accumulation of consequences from choices that are not supportive, and this is what can contribute to the health of our body and our breasts.

  3. “What if the real truth is that potentially we all bear Breast Cancer?” – this is a sobering thought, but is a way to consider the fact that our choices do matter – a lot!

  4. Self loathing is huge and its something unfortunately that effects most women in society at some point in their lives, how horrid this is when the truth is our beauty is beyond measure yet many of us dare not to go there and allow this truth to be known.

  5. It cannot, not even one ounce surprise us when we find ourselves being diagnosed with breast cancer if we have been living in the abuse and disregard for self. We have to bear the consequences for living in such a way or how else would we learn?

  6. Great call for all women to be more deeply self loving and nurturing with ourselves and our breasts. Having spent many years doing my best to ignore the fact that I had breasts I have been enjoying exploring my deepening relationship with mine and the wisdom that they impart when I am willing to listen.

  7. When we develop an awareness of the nurturing centre of our breasts and care for them as an integral part of our delicate body we offer an inspiration to others.

  8. Today I brought two new bras and wow do they feel good, buying a bra that fits correctly and is the right fabric is a super loving thing to do for oneself.

  9. Viktoria I agree developing and building a relationship with our breasts is extremely important, the way we look after them, the way we moisturise them, the way we place them in our bras every detail of our connect to them is super duper important. I know I never used to have any of that until attending Universal Medicine and starting to have a relationship with my body, then the Esoteric Breast Massage was introduced, practiced by women and this was revolutionary as I had never connected to my breasts in this way and the quality that this area of my body as woman hold and when connected to express. So deeply powerful and healing.

    1. Yes, Natalie. Our breasts are so much more than eye candy for thirsty hienas. As our respect for ourselves and our breasts grows, we begin to learn what they actually represent in our lives. How have we not made the link as a common sense kind of norm is baffling.

  10. There is a seriously large gaping hole in our understanding of medicine and health. Somehow we think that self loathing and lack of self worth is NOT affecting our physical health and well being and that the thoughts are only in our head. But thoughts are never isolated to the head alone and are purely energy. So it is a failed model to consider that the two are separate. How we are with ourselves affects our thoughts, quality of well being and overall level of health and vitality

  11. Self caring and nurturing our breasts and body develops an honouring relationship with all we feel. Since reconnecting with my body in this way it allows me to feel any movement away from this honouring.

    1. Beautifully said Victoria – the body is the marker of truth and a simple way for us to re-connect back to a deeper part of ourselves.

  12. For so many years (decades, centuries.. perhaps since the birth of the planet) the sacredness held in the woman’s body has been dismissed, suppressed and lied about. Today we are made to believe that the sole purpose of breasts is to feed another, there is so much attention on breasts in a sexual manner, so much about having the perfect pair. But these sensitive part of our bodies is much grander than that, it is our nurturing centres and once we start to develop a deeper connection with our breasts there is no way we could allow abuse, there is no way that we could allow anything less than what we have connected to. I am no sociology expert, but with the relationship I am developing with these precious nerve centres, I am beginning to understand A LOT more about the dynamics that play out in everyday life with myself and others, I can see and feel things which explain a lot about how the world is at the moment.

    There are so many, far too many of us women who have completely disconnected from our breasts to an extent where I saw a video of a woman smashing dr.pepper cans with her breast. Until we, ourselves as women start to claim the sacredness stored so deeply in our body, nothing in this world of ours will change.

    1. Yes it hurts to feel how far many of us have strayed from the connection to all we are as women, the sacredness within and the depth of stillness that is our nature. To honour all that is the expression of the woman is to honour all of us. Our reflections are needed for the restoration of our world.

  13. This is well worth considering, ‘ Every loveless choice we make, all the abuse we might allow, the lack of self-care, self-loathing, disregard for self-nurturing in our lives, every time we look at our breasts and judge them, insult them, or do not appreciate them we could be taking steps towards developing Breast Cancer.’

  14. This is a good point you make Viktoria – that breast cancer does not happen overnight. It is an accumulation of disregard and often brought on by a woman putting everyone else’s needs before her own. Therefore it makes sense that to reverse breast cancer, we as women need to deeply nurture ourselves and never disconnect from our breasts that are after all the centre from which the light of this nurturing emanates.

  15. They are great questions Viktoria, for me to ponder on, though I do care for my breast much more now days, there is so much more tenderness I can bring to that beautiful part of my body, I love tenderly holding my breasts in my hands feeling them being nurtured.

  16. ‘We haven’t fully stopped to consider that ‘no (wo)man is an island’ and that every single one of us plays a part in the whole. That Breast Cancer in the lives of millions of women concerns us ALL, women and men, not just those affected and their families, friends …’ This is the truth it concerns us all, we all contribute even the slightest thought I have about my breast or my body that is not supporting to love and nurture myself is already too much and contributes to the whole, thanks for this reminder Victoria we need to hear this!

    1. What quality are we adding to the pool we all swim in…we can all feel energetically what goes on even though we may no see it. Our every movement matters; a reuniting reminder for us all.

  17. A woman’s breasts emanate her nurturing essence and when we are aware of this we can feel the precious delicateness of this area of the whole body.

  18. Ever since this blog I have been paying attention to my breasts more, and it’s very interesting to feel that whenever I have been in disregard my breasts actually look like they are sad. On the contrary when I have been caring, I can feel the feminity and tenderness they emanate.

      1. Perhaps we may not be paying attention because what they communicate is ever so honest and delicate and not many of us are willing to go there, to understand our preciousness and allow ourselves to move with that knowing.

  19. Tenderness used to be a very alien topic to me, I played with the boys, ran around fields, climbed trees and was genuinely convinced that in order to be successful in society women should be more like men. Through my work with Universal Medicine I have come to feel that I too can be a tender woman, a precious realisation that deepens as we go around the sun.

  20. ” So let’s start by being more caring, deeply nurturing, super loving, with us and our breasts, and see how Breast Cancer likes that. ”
    I would say that the Cancer would be very appreciative, for cancer is only the messenger and everyone wants to shoot the messenger.

  21. “every single one of us has the power to not allow breast cancer to run riot by putting breast care and self-care on top of our list of priorities” Wow if we all took note of this and put self love self care into practice we would see the rates of breast cancer go down over night.

  22. It is so easy to have an ideal slip in that says our breast are not right but reading this I feel how important it is to observe and ask ourselves: ‘What is it actually bringing me when I do not like my breasts? Is this really supporting and loving me? And therefor what is the reflection I bring to all woman around the world when I meet them?’.

  23. ‘That every single one of us has the power to not allow breast cancer to run riot by putting breast care and self-care on top of our list of priorities.’ Spot on Viktoria, we all hold a responsibility to self-care and nurture, as the ripple effect felt by these movements is truly inspiring.

  24. Without accepting, appreciating and adoring our breasts, we are leaving very important female parts out and we are not whole as a woman and therefor cannot share the stillness and sacredness that is part of being a woman.

  25. From experience I know all women and that means ALL women are deeply beautiful and sacred. All the excuses of why a woman’s breasts are not worth loving are all excuses for them to not embrace and show the world their innate beauty and wisdom

  26. A good gauntlet to lay down ! I am very aware that there is so much more depth that I can go to with self care and nurturing, it was initially alien but now it is less so but is very much something I need to be conscious of.

    1. Yes it is a gauntlet isn’t it! How many of us will wait till there is a questionable scan before we consider bringing more self-care into our lives. Before we consider that how we look at our bodies and the silent or not so silent criticism affects us physically?

  27. I love the concept of being cheeky and our loving your breasts so much, that the cancer or anything for that matter that is not that love, feels uncomfortable. You ask some amazing questions in this blog but one that really stuck with me is ” When did you last care for your breasts the way you care for your face? ”

    It sounds simple but it’s is so true. I remember a dentist asked me when I was in my 20s, if I would be concerned if my fingers were bleeding every time I bumped them gently, I said yes, that would freak me out. He then said, then why are you allowing gum disease, that means, every time you lightly brush or floss your teeth, your mouth bleeds, to go on in your body with no concerns?

    It stuck with me this comment, as it made me consider that maybe the ideas we have about health, need some reassessing.

    1. So true Sarah, the bleeding gums scenario is really common. For most of us we will continue doing what ever we want until the consequences come a knocking. And then often we are super angry, belligerent that an illness ‘befalls’ us. It really is quite the ignorant number we have been playing for thousands of years. Eventually we wake up, how gracious that is up to us.

    2. Awesome points Sarah! Love what you have shared here and it is so true – we need to re-assess how we look at health and well being!

  28. This is such an uncomfortable read, and that’s because I recognise so much in what is offered here … if we or I do not truly care for our breasts then how can we say we do not have an unhealthy relationship with them, and isn’t that lack of care the start of die-ease and how far does that go … all the way to breast cancer, it can. For it’s all one line and if we’re anywhere on that line we are part of it. So our part is to see how we are with our breasts and to care for them or even start caring for them as a part of us, not an appendage but an integral part of us, not for their functions but just for themselves.

    1. So much has changed for me since writing this blog, sometimes I can actually feel what goes on underneath the skin on my breasts. The flow of the veins, and tissue – it is a beautiful sensation, and a sad one at the same time. Sad because I know that I have lived in complete disconnection to this beauty for my whole life, beautiful because it makes me feel feminine, precious and sexy. Feelings which I don’t have to share with anybody or show anybody. It’s a gift from me to me.

  29. Once we are willing to build a true quality of connection and awareness with our way of being our whole relationship with ourselves deepens in the way we hold and value ourselves as a woman.

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