Often with even the best breast care, it is commonly accepted that cysts in the body are not dangerous, even when they feel like a lump. On many occasions, with further examination the lump is found to be a small, generally harmless sac filled with fluid, rather than a cancerous or benign lump of cells – there may even be one cyst or many cysts appearing together that end up being benign.
From a very young age the only relationship I had with my breasts was one laced with despair, discomfort and shame. Having developed breasts from a young age I spent most of my life trying to hide their size and wishing they were not so large, as I didn’t like the attention that they attracted, particularly from boys and later on men.
It wasn’t until I had a breast cancer diagnosis in 2008 and being faced with surgery did the relationship I had with my breasts change.
The first change in relationship was that it was now based on fear – the fear of losing my breasts, the very breasts that I had for such a long time ignored and condemned. All of a sudden they were not so bad after all.
I developed breast cancer five years ago and I knew it was a ‘wake up call’ for me to change my ways. I had spent most of my life focused on helping other people instead of first caring for myself by living in a way that is loving and honouring of me.
Focusing mainly on others proved to be detrimental to my own body. I had been disregarding of how I was living. By being constantly on the go, propelled by the nervous energy that seemed to be energizing but in fact was extremely exhaustive. At the time, I didn’t feel the degree to which I was exhausted and how tired I was as I hadn’t been focusing on how my body really felt.
Could it be that our body’s intelligence knows what is true and what is not and therefore brings to our awareness behaviours that do not support our health and wellbeing? Could it be that all illness and disease is our body’s way of healing aspects of ourselves that are not true? This is certainly my experience with breast cancer. Through cancer I have found out that my body had another reality about life. Continue reading “Breast Cancer – How and Why?”
When was the last time you stood in front of a mirror, naked, and looked at your breasts?
When was the last time you stood in front of a mirror, naked, and looked at your breasts, absolutely without any judgement?
When was the last time you washed and moisturised your breasts with the tenderness, equal if not greater to holding a newborn baby?
When did you last care for your breasts the way you care for your face?
It is well worth stopping and pondering on these questions…
So, how do we see our breasts?
I walk into my first Esoteric Breast Massage session, butterflies in my tummy, unsure of what is going to happen and how I’ll feel. We talk for a short while then it is time to begin the bodywork part of the treatment. As I undress, gently and deliberately folding my clothes, my bra sits atop the small pile as the last piece to come off taking with it my cover, my protection – or so I thought.
For a moment I stand there exposed and yet strangely detached. I have shut out any feelings of embarrassment by putting on my “I can deal with anything” front. Even though the practitioner has encouraged me to allow fragility and express myself so that I am comfortable throughout each part, I have auto-piloted myself into the same disguise I wear when I have a smear test i.e. I lie back with my legs in the air and check out from my body for a while, I grin and bear it.