A Woman Getting Older and being Fabulous

Ever since I was a child, the world always presented a really consistent view of ageing as being something I most definitely should not consider looking forward to. Old age has certainly been given bad press by everyone. There’s the adage ‘old age does not come alone’; that, along with all the many derogatory jokes about getting old, made it quite clear that ageing was not to be valued at all.

As a child if I looked at the men and women in my life who were older and they did not present an inspiring view of being older. I recall seeing old women who always seemed very ancient to me, having very wrinkly skin, dressing in drab dark colours and with their hair always grey, worn in unflattering styles. I could not imagine them ever having been young, happy or carefree.

Seeing younger middle-aged women didn’t give me a good feeling about getting older either – I saw many talking together about their pains, depression and criticizing other women.

Each generation seemed to struggle with ageing and each, including my own, had challenges in the times they lived in, with most of us seeming to give up and act in ways which reflects those struggles.

Yet now here I am, in my sixties, an older woman who is beautiful, vital, and lively, and who works at a traditionally high stress and high burn out job; yet I have more energy than I did in my thirties. I am more engaged with life, the world and the community I live in than at any other time in my life.

What has changed for me?

How I live my life!

Having developed my appreciation of the woman I am through dedicating myself to making on-going self-loving choices:

I know the key is about loving myself and not letting abuse into my life.

Loving myself determines how I feel at any age.

I have learned that the depth of love I can give to myself is then in everything I do, say and think. It is the love that is with me at the beginning of the day and the love I take to bed with me at night.

I am learning just how much that

If I choose this gorgeous ever deepening love in me, then I can feel for myself how sexy that really is.

People can’t help but notice this, and yes – in a world that makes older women invisible, they notice.

I was in a meeting recently with a man who I hadn’t met before, he asked me politely, ‘how are you?’ I replied ‘Well you know, I’m really, really well thank you.’ He looked at me properly for the first time, leaned back in his chair and said in a very surprised voice, ‘Yes! You do look really well!’

He seemed puzzled to realise this was so.

He is right: not only, do I look ‘well’, I am radiant, I walk with a confidence and grace that is super-sexy.

Sixty brought me a new freedom. Sixty-two is here and I feel a real love of being alive and accepting of my amazing and beautiful self.

I find myself to be ageing at a most glorious time in my life when I can now state without any hesitation –

Why would anyone not want to be older?

This age I am has so much freedom, fun and juiciness to it and this all comes from the way I live and the day-to-day, and, moment-by-moment choices I make in my life. Such as, refusing to allow that super-critical thought in, or let any thoughts attack me, choosing what I eat and what I don’t eat. And yes, I enjoy wearing clothes to show off my gorgeousness – tying my cardigan in a knot under my breasts, choosing colours and styles that express how I feel, but I recognise that

There’s nothing in this world that can give me the beauty I am as a woman.

New Iris Pic Nov 2015

This is me and I am grace in motion.  

The inspiration for living in this way has come from attending workshops, presentations and courses by Serge Benhayon and Universal Medicine and from talks and presentations by two gorgeous wise women, Simone Benhayon and Natalie Benhayon. They are like goddesses at their age, and inspire me to feel like a goddess at mine.

By Ariana Ray, England

You may also Enjoy:

Sex Appeal Of Beautiful Mature Women – What Exactly Does That Look Like?!

Josephine Bell explores the choice of women to age gracefully while bringing true sexy back. “… have you ever really looked deeply at and felt an older woman? There is a sense of something rich, mature and possibly deep that can emanate through her body, a quality that is attractive in and of itself …”

What is being Truly Sexy?

One woman asks what true sexy is “… I used to see being sexy as an age thing and that as you went past a certain age that was it – no more sexy! … Being Truly sexy is about inspiring other women that we are ALL truly sexy, and all we need to do is connect to the enormous sensual, sacred and tender love that we have inside.”

And Rowena Parkes talks how she and her husband are Living a Harmonious Life in our Eighties

“ … As we enter our ninth decade … I feel more alive and more joyful than at any other stage of my life because for the first time I take full responsibility and know that my wellbeing is totally up to me … ”

1,058 thoughts on “A Woman Getting Older and being Fabulous

  1. “Each generation seemed to struggle with ageing and each, including my own”. Do we struggle with ageing, or do we struggle with living disconnected to our essence, the love within ourselves?

  2. There is something in this Woman in Livingness thing, I feel more beautiful, sassy, sexy and more content with myself then how I did in my twenties.

  3. Very inspiring, reading this makes me want to get older. It’s easy to get sucked into the belief that getting older sucks, but it doesn’t have to be that way. Appreciating ourselves goes a long way to how we feel about ourselves and ageing.

  4. Adopting pictures of how we should behave, what we should physically have around us (job, partner, kids, house, certain grades) is present at every age. It feels amazing to disregard these images and live how we feel to and equally amazing when we see a woman who is doing just that!

  5. Thank you Ariana for exploding so many myths around women ageing that has for so long made so many women dread getting older. Your choices to live lovingly and inspire others with your vitality and sexiness is a reflection that is much needed in a world where men and women are generally getting sicker as they age but you demonstrate that not only need this not be the case but life can be purposeful and fun in our sixties and beyond.

  6. We very rarely here about ageing and juiciness in the same sentence because for some reason getting older is associated with drying up and having less ‘usefulness’. Your blog is inspiring and building a relationship with who we are and feeling at ease with that, letting go of the mothering and the doing and embracing space – yum.

  7. Sixties is the decade in which I learned to truly love and be myself. The feeling I have is of fully connecting with my body and life. A beautiful time.

  8. Born into an African culture the one thing preserved was respect and reverence of elders. The women I knew didn’t have a problem with ageing – they simply accepted it and got on with life.

  9. Beautiful Ariana, so many as they age become invisible in society, but what you are reflecting to the world is how sexy, vibrant and joyful we can be as we age. This is powerful as we have much to learn from the wisdom of our elders.

  10. Loving ourselves deeply is paramount, and this then benefits everyone, ‘Loving myself determines how I feel at any age.
    I have learned that the depth of love I can give to myself is then in everything I do, say and think’.

  11. Just beautiful Ariana. You bring a total different reflection to the world: that you can feel gorgeous, funny, radiant also – or should I say even more – when we get older. As we should and could learn each day, each day could be used to discard the not-love we are, to reveal more of absolute divine beauty we are.

  12. When I am connected to the ‘well of love’ inside me, then I feel timeless…and hence ageless. I can only conclude that love is ageless and timeless and that, if we know this as our essence, so are we.

    1. With that comes a lot of wisdom as well. Many times I have had the comments that I look so young but act much greater than my physical age. The age of your body doesn’t really determine how the being inside should (or does) act.

  13. Great blog Ariana – I am now nearer 70 than 60 and agree with all you write – no way does the menopause or post menopause mean sitting on a shelf and gathering dust , withering away like a dry old stick until the last breath. Attending Universal Medicine events continues to inspired me and many thousands of others to live and enjoy a very different way by re-connecting to the innermost essence.

  14. This is so inspiring to any woman Ariana, because we are all get older and we do not have to fit into that drab model where we feel ‘past it’, ‘lost it’ or ‘over the hill’. We can grow more wise, more wonderful and more graceful, when we know inside ourselves how yummy we really are.

  15. “This is me and I am grace in motion.” this sums it up.. we are already grace in motion, at any age: we don’t have to work hard to be it, or grow into it, just embrace what’s already within us, and allow it out. Your blog Ariana shows that ageing doesn’t have to be how we’ve accepted that it is. To me it feels like something to whole-heartedly embrace. Growing in confidence and radiance as we get older is actually something that happens naturally – as long as we continue to commit to loving and accepting ourselves on ever-deeper levels.

  16. What an opportunity, to be able to celebrate being older and feeling amazing and vital and inspiring others to consider that as a potential ‘normal’ for themselves.

  17. “If I choose this gorgeous ever deepening love in me, then I can feel for myself how sexy that really is” – absolutely Ariana, and there is nothing more sexy than a woman in love with who she is and her living the knowingness of her inner beauty and bounty of wisdom.

  18. Age is such a construct we put on ourselves because when we see age as a marker to what we have achieved in lineal time, it would reflect poorly on us. If it reflected well in lineal time, our bodies would be reflected poorly, as the disregard and rush to achieve something in lineal time would not be about quality. An woman such as yourself Ariana who lives and breathes the connection with herself at any age and free from the ideals and beliefs imposed by lineal time is offering an amazing and needed reflection to all women. Life is first and foremost about our innermost.

  19. I had the same as you Ariana, there is still that sense in our society that older women become and are invisible and don’t count and I know for myself I had the idea my life would end at fifty I guess because of this phenomenon. Women like you change the tide and I am not yet in my sixties but ageing is no longer a threat but something to look forward to, thank you for your reflection of being grace in motion.

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