Relationships – Inspiring Love in Another

by Danielle Pirera, Australia

I recently read a blog written by Raymond Karam about “The True Beauty of Women”.

This was a very inspiring blog in which I felt the depth of what this man was saying and what he was claiming for himself and also for all women. I felt how Raymond was very willing to deeply connect with, appreciate and celebrate the sacredness and power of a woman when she is really herself. Not only this, but he was sharing that every woman has this quality or way inside her equally, and that it is very natural.

I began to consider the possibility that maybe many men around me (such as Raymond) are starting to accept and reflect the truly lovely, tender and powerful men that they are, which is inviting women to feel that they are this same powerful person naturally on the inside, ready to be it at any time.

Pondering on this further, I recognised that when in a relationship, people will often ask their partner to be more loving. For example, a wife may want her husband to be more caring, loving and considerate, or the husband may ask his wife to be more understanding and less demanding or needy. I am now seeing that there are two ways to ask such things:-

1. Someone can ask (or almost instruct) their partner to ‘step up’ and be more loving. When demanding another person to be more loving, it can place a pressure on them and so offers no real support for them to choose this love for themselves. This way of asking (demanding) another to be loving is very imposing and is actually not loving in itself because such demands of the other are coming from their very own needs and emptiness – which only highlights their own lack of self-love. In this way the partner is being held ‘to ransom’ in the action that ‘says’ – ‘it’s ok for me to not be loving because you aren’t being loving’.

2. A more loving way to ‘ask’ another to be loving involves no conversation or demands (conscious or otherwise) about them ‘needing to change’ and ‘be more loving’. Instead it’s about how we live around them and being loving with ourselves first and then with the other in full, no matter what. This reflects to them that they are also this love, that they deserve it and can choose the same. This is more inspiring than directly ‘asking’ or ‘complaining’ and so makes it very easy for someone to then choose this love, because they can get to feel what this actually feels like from the person who is expressing it (love); also they are able to see their own possible steps towards their own love from the other, and be inspired.

Inspiring another to be love or loving in such a way requires no effort and places no pressure on the other person to ‘get it right’; it’s also not the end of the world should the person happen to fall from time to time during their re-claiming of their love.

This manner of inspiring is really lovely and very unimposing on people as they are given the space to ‘just be’ in life, to unfold and develop their own way in their own time.

183 thoughts on “Relationships – Inspiring Love in Another

  1. Reflecting to each other a loving way of being brings an ever deepening connection and love into a relationship.

  2. Giving people space to feel for themselves what is true is and continuing to be love ourselves allows for whatever needs to unfold.

  3. To be loving with self in the moment is everything because it means I am lovingly with myself no matter what is going on around me. It is therefore impossible to demand, impose, control, dismiss etc another even if I feel hurt for I am taking responsibility for everything that lies within me.

  4. We are simply choosing to be love in our lives, and if another is inspired by this and chooses likewise then that is beautiful, ‘This manner of inspiring is really lovely and very unimposing on people as they are given the space to ‘just be’ in life, to unfold and develop their own way in their own time.’

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